STOKE-ON-TRENT WOMAN SECTIONED FOR CLAIMING TO BE BETTER THAN DAZ MANCHILD SMITH AT CUTTING TROUPE MUSIC

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Kelly Edwards of the Wrenettes Dance Troupe based in Longton, Stoke-on-Trent, has been sectioned indefinitely for bizarrely claiming to be able to cut troupe music better than Manchester based music cutting icon Daz Manchild Smith.

Despite being a longtime friend and former companion of Ms Edwards, Mr Smith welcomed the decision and issued a statement saying “That som bitch had it coming, and that’s a big 10-4!..... Pontin’s will be a bit strange without her this year, but to be fair, she always falls asleep after half a Carling anyway”.

More to follow.....

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