BAD YESHIVA BOY CAUGHT AIDING TERRORIST GROUPS

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Nadav Cohen, 15 of Roslyn Heights today was arrested after the FBI, CIA, and local law enforcement conducted a raid of his Roslyn home. When they authorities entered, they witnessed Gaddy Cohen and his wife watching a movie in their living room. They then witnessed brother Zachary Cohen hooking up with his girlfriend Sariah in the bathroom. The youngest brother Liam was found in his room fast asleep. The authorities then kicked Nadav’s bedroom door down and found him jerking off to a picture of his stat teacher, Mrs. Calvagno. The FBI agents then demanded Nadav put some pants on as they were about to take him into custody. The authorities then shipped Nadav to Guantanmo Bay. During Nadav’s interrogation, CIA agents were able to extract that he provided them over $10,000,000. He justified this payment by saying “It is ok to fund the little terrorist groups as long as the bigger ones are taken care of.” When asked how he knew ISIS would be fought by the Hoothi Rebels, Nadav responded with “They joined NATO and gave me a pinky swear.” A federal judge has decided that Nadav will be executed by an electric chair so that his gay will be cured before he goes to hell.

This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.

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