SECRET TO FAIRFIELD HIGH THREE POINT SHOOTING PERCENTAGES DISCOVERED
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Fairfield is one of only a few programs in the nation to have 2 players(Caleb Fields and Brycen Goodine) in the top 75 in three point shooting percentage. Exactly how Fairfield has moved from one of the bottom teams in the nation (360) in this category last year, to a top 50 team this season has remained closely guarded. But recently, the Early Edition secured copies of secret photos of Brycen Goodine and Caleb Fields munching on popcorn immediately before their respective 40 and 33 point outbursts. After seeing these photos, and a similar photo of Nellie Brown eating popcorn at Mahoney Arena before her 35 point performance, it seems Fairfield’s popcorn secret is out of the bag. Confidentially, these high scorers told members of the EE staff, “I didn’t think the popcorn would help my shooting so much. All these years I have been taking hundreds of shots per day to try and get better when all I really needed was this special Mahoney arena popcorn.” While it may seem to some unlikely the popcorn could improve their shooting so much, even Chris Casey acknowledges that there is “a kernel of truth to the whole popcorn thing.” Following the release of these photos, advance scouts from Iona University were seen sneaking out of Mahoney with large bags of popcorn to feed to their players. To counter this move by Tobin Anderson, Chris Casey plans to bring extra popcorn to the Iona game. According to Casey, “Everyone’s going to need a lot of popcorn Friday night, it promises to be a competitive and exciting game.”
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
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